The picture I promised you…


About a month ago, I was having a few glasses of wine with some girlfriends and said yes to one of their insane suggestions. I had showed them this picture I found on Pinterest and we joked about our days of wearing a banana clip and crimping our hair. After pouring another glass, one of them said, “Hey, you should recreate that picture when you hit 5,000 followers on Facebook!” And since I’m a lush and obviously in need of a higher alcohol tolerance level, I said yes.

As a reminder, this was the picture we saw.

banana clips

Readers, fellow bloggers and writers, and even old friends from high school, helped me to quickly get to 5,000. I was thrilled and terrified all at the same time.

And last night, the night of the banana clip photo shoot arrived.

One friend offered to do my makeup and another took the photo. Throughout it all, I wondered, “What the hell did I get myself into? Why couldn’t I just have been happy with 4,000 Facebook followers???”

And so, since you have been with me through this journey, I thought I would first share some pics of the process so you can feel like you were laughing right alongside of us. Or at me. I think everyone was actually laughing at me.

starting to crimp

My face after the first crimp. It became very obvious to me in that instant that I had gotten myself into something that would end with me looking very unattractive.

fighting the banana clip

The pain. The pain of the hair ripping into the banana clip. Also the pain of losing your dignity and ability to feel remotely young.

eyemakeup

The most makeup I think I have ever worn in my life. Also, the moment I realized I open my mouth when eye makeup is being applied. Weird.

laughing

Getting ready to pose and not being able to keep a straight face. I have no idea how models do it. And by “it”, I mean not eat anything and walk in heels.

And after all that. Are you ready?

Here it is!!

banana clips  Final picture

I did my best, folks. The crimping kept coming out of my hair. And no one can seriously glow to the level the model was glowing. Plus, I’m about to be 40 and she’s probably not old enough to see an “R-rated” movie. And yep, I added earrings. The awesome reader, Mercy Fritz, who mailed me her old Vidal Sassoon crimper, sent them along with it so I couldn’t resist!

So I did it. I recreated that damn photo. And I laughed with friends the entire time and appreciated all the people who helped get me there.

And in the end, after the photo session was over, here’s what I did.

after it is all done

I broke that damn banana clip in half and said thank god the 80′s are dead.

And here’s a few out-takes for you…

out-takes 3 out-takes out-takes2

 

Seriously though, thank you all for the support. You guys rock so much more than any hair device ever could.

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Interview with my kids


interview-with-kidsThe other day I overheard my daughter telling her friend that her mommy knows Taylor Swift. I interrupted her and said, “No, sweetie, I don’t know Taylor Swift” and she looked confused and said, “I asked you if you knew who sang the song and you said yes.”

So I thought I would conduct an experiment and interview my children to see how much they really know about me. I can now officially state that I’m a stranger to them.

Where is Mommy from?

5 Yr Old Daughter: The place with the really big apple

2 Yr Old Son: Upstairs

Actual Answer: New York

 

What is Mommy’s job?

5 Yr Old Daughter: To type really fast on the computer

2 Yr Old Son: Make us granola bars (I’ve never made a granola bar in my life)

Actual Answer: Freelance writer

 

What is Mommy’s favorite food?

5 Yr Old Daughter: Mac and Cheese

2 Yr Old Son: Mac and Cheese

Actual Answer: Anything with wine, except Mac and Cheese.

 

What drives Mommy crazy?

5 Yr Old Daughter: When we don’t listen

2 Yr Old Son: Daddy

Actual Answer: When they and Daddy don’t listen.

 

What does Mommy want to be when she grows up?

5 Yr Old Daughter: I think you’re old already.

2 Yr Old Son: Uhm…a digger?

Actual Answer: No longer sleep deprived.

 

What does Mommy do after you go to bed?

5 Yr Old Daughter: Drink wine

2 Yr Old Son: Drink wine

Actual Answer: Drink Wine

 

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What I’ve Learned from Blogging in Two Years…


martinis-and-minivans-two-yearsMy blog just celebrated it’s second year of life. Like any toddler, it’s had its tantrums and its triumphs.

I remember when it started walking on its own. When I didn’t have to spend every minute worrying over details like SEO, keywords and Google ranking. I could just set the parameters and let it walk.

Now two years later, I’ve learned a lot about being a mother to a blog.

I’ve learned that you have to pick your battles. You have to figure out what’s important to you and only write about that. You can’t please everyone and not all readers will like everything you say.

I’ve learned that it’s okay to say no to your blog. Just because it stands there, looking at you longingly, does not mean you have to give it attention every minute of the day.

I’ve learned that just like toddlers, blogs want you to get them the latest and greatest toy. It’s easy as a parent of a blog to get lured in by the flashy stuff. But in the end, you really just need your words. Fancy pictures, beautiful designs, and a long list of advertisers is nice – but your words are the connection to a reader. And those will take you down the long road.

And lastly, I’ve learned that with any kind of parenting – whether it be to actual children or blogs without faces – having a glass of wine/gin & tonic/martini/beer/straight vodka out of the bottle or any other beverage of your choice,  makes everything better.

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Mother’s Day – A mixed bag for me…

three generations of mothers

Three generations of mothers…

Mother’s day is a strange one for me. The part where my children wake me up with cards, breakfast, and a plethora of crafts that I can’t identify without my husband mouthing their meanings behind their heads – that part is awesome. However, the part where I remember that Mother’s Day was the last day I saw my grandmother alive  - not so much.

I truly love thinking about my grandmother. Most days I smile instead of frown, and I feel joy instead of pain. She lived a very long, very filled life.

But I still want more.

I still want her to be here. I want her to see my children grow up. To hear when my daughter asks questions like, “Will I ever grow a penis?” or when my son kisses my toes and asks if he can put one in his mouth. You know, the great stuff about parenting.

And I know she can’t. At least not in the physical sense.

I try not to remember that last day. The pain of walking out of her room and knowing in my soul I was never going to see her alive again. I carry that with me every day.

But I try not to keep that load too heavy. I have two little ones who need me to be excited about what they just built out of Legos or happy to see their glitter glued creations stuck to the floor.

So on Mother’s Day, I’ll smile. I’ll smile because I got to love her. She got to love my children. And together, we were mothers. That’s what it’s all about, right?

And to my own mother – you deserve the greatest thanks of all. I love you. You are the strength that binds it all together.

So happy Mother’s Day to all of you. Whether you are a mother or celebrate having one, thank you for being part of my motherhood journey.

 

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A banana clip update…


The day is getting closer. Much much closer. No, not Mother’s Day. No, not the last day of school.

I’m talking about the day that I recreate this photo.

banana clips

If you’re new here, let me explain. While playing around on Pinterest, and pinning to my boards “Rooms My Son Would Ruin” and “Things I’ll Never Be Stylish Enough To Wear” – I came across the picture above. I have no idea if they were serious or not, but I had a few cocktails in me and thought it would be hilarious to recreate it.

My plan is to recreate it completely – banana clip, crimped hair and bad Wet-N-Wild makeup – when I reach 5,000 Facebook followers. I’ve been getting the help of TONS of bloggers who are sharing my plight with their readers. And I’ve been shouting out those bloggers here on the blog.

The crazy thing is that I’m only 120 followers away!!! How nuts is that??? I started this blog two years ago and am so unbelievable grateful for the support.

Here’s links to some of the latest bloggers to help me. I hope you’ll give them the same awesome love you have given me. They are seriously good peeps.

Kim Ulmanis Mom To Step and In Between
Visions by Volante Not Enough Wine in the World
Ready Set Parenthood Who Really Cares What I Think
Moms of Purpose Shit Happens Then There’s Alcohol
The Wild and Wonderful World of Gingersnaps Silence of the Mom
The Madness of Joy All Four Love
Mommy In Demand Cranky Mom of Two
I was promised more naps Momtools
Single Modern Mom Domestic Pirate
Mommy Needs a Break Lisa Nolan
Chocolate and Sunshine

 

And let me know if you help spread the word – I’d love to shout you out. I’m all about bloggers and writers ruling the world… (insert maniacal laugh here…)

To “like” me on Facebook – click HERE!

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Whatever After – FINALLY a series for my daughter where a princess saves herself


whatever after bad hair dayMy five-year-old daughter lives and breaths all things princesses.  She uses her blanket as a cape, she makes a construction crown with jewels almost every day and she is constantly asking me if I can be her servant. If she only knew I already was…

The hard part about all this is that I’m a feminist. It breaks my heart every time I read a fairy tale and the princess longs to be saved by the cocky, arrogant prince. I hate seeing her waiting around a castle or sleeping until she gets kissed.

So I was thrilled when I saw a book called Whatever After: Fairest Of All at the bookstore. My daughter loved the young, sassy girl on the cover and I loved the premise of the book. A brother and a sister find a magical mirror in their basement that takes them into a fairy tale. NOT a Disney fairy tale – the REAL stuff.  The stories where the mermaid is supposed to die at the end. The best part is that they mess up the story and the lead female character learns how to stand on her own. I LOVED IT! I seriously loved reading another chapter every night.

So I sent the author an email. I had to tell her how much I loved her books. I wanted her to know how psyched I was that finally someone dared to make a princess independent. That maybe she didn’t choose to be rescued. Maybe she actually rescued herself.

And then I thought – what the hell, maybe she’ll let me interview her for the blog. I’d love to learn more about her and since many of you guys are parents, maybe you too would like to learn more about the books.

And lucky me! She agreed! And she’s awesome. WHY? Because she not only gave me an interview but she also sent me a copy of her latest book to GIVEAWAY!  And I’m not embarrassed to say that I might actually be more excited for the next book in the series that comes out today (April 29) maybe even a bit more than my daughter…

I found the first book in your Whatever After series (Fairest of All) when I was looking for a book for my young daughter that was about fairy tales yet had a more feminist, positive nature than traditional tales. I was truly tired of reading books where a prince came to the rescue. What made you go in such a unique and different direction with the class fairy tales? Did you share my sentiment? What was your inspiration?

I had the idea for Whatever After since way back when I was a kid. I loved fractured fairy tales even as a six-year-old. I rewrote The Princess and the Pea as The Princess and the M&M. I was not a fan of vegetables. And I share your feminist sentiments exactly. I love fairy tales but dislike the save-the-damsel-in-distress endings. I decided Whatever After was my chance to inject them with humor and girl-power.

If you personally could pick a fairy tale to go into and “mess up”, which one would it be?

The Little Mermaid, definitely. Do you know what happens at the end of the original story? The Little Mermaid DIES! Seriously! Saddest ending ever. I would love to mess that one up and give poor Little Mermaid a happy, non-dead ending.

How many books would you like to write in the Whatever After series? Are we going to see the siblings as they get older?

I’d like to go on forever. Well, maybe not forever, but definitely for a lot longer. There are tons of fairy tales I’d still like to tangle. AladdinThe Princess & the PeaThe Snow Queen (every kid I’ve met in the last three months begs me to do Frozen). Hansel and GretelWhatever After #5: Bad Hair Day (Rapunzel) comes out on April 29th, and I’m currently writing Beauty Queen (Beauty & the Beast). I’m not sure about whether I’ll age them… maybe a little, but I can’t imagine I’ll have Abby in high school. They’d have to move the books to the YA section.

Tell us about the first book you ever published. Was it adult/ya/middle? What was that process like? How did you get your start?

My first published novel was adult chick lit. At the time, I was single and working at Harlequin Romances, marketing novels such as The Virgin Bride Said Wow. Yes—that is a real title. Anyway, I found the juxtaposition between the books I marketed and my single-in-the-big-city life ironic and the perfect experience to explore in fiction. I wrote Milkrun, a novel about a romance copy editor who gets dumped via e-mail.

If you could have dinner with three other authors, living or dead, who would they be?

Judy Blume, Margaret Atwood and Jane Austen.

If you could write a book under a different pen name that was totally different from anything you have written before, what would the story be about?

It would be a teen horror novel. Like a Christopher Pike or Lois Duncan book. Chain LetterDown a Dark Hall! Last Act! I loved those books so much. I was obsessed with both writers as a teen.

As a writer, what’s your Achilles heel? What’s the one thing you are terrible at? (As you can see, I’m terrible at grammar and ending words with a preposition)

Hah, I am, too. I am also a terrible speler. Okay, I did that one on purpose. But all I can say is: Spell check, I love you.

If you could pick a celebrity to play Jonah and Abby – who would they be?

For Jonah, maybe Jakob Davies? He’s playing the little brother in If I Stay–the movie based on the amazing novel written by Gayle Forman. And he’s Canadian! I’m Canadian and I like to support my people. For Abby, I love Ariel Winter from Modern Family. She’s also the voice of Sofia the First. My two girls are OBSESSED with Sofia the First. Ariel might be too old to be play Abby, but I don’t mind if they age up the part. My girls would freak out. Although my five-year-old would probably lobby to play Abby herself…or at the very least Cinderella or Rapunzel. I wonder if a studio would let me put that in the contract?

Thanks so much for chatting with us Sarah! You rock!

I hope you’ll all give her some love. She writes tons of stuff – not just this series – that are definitely worth checking out. You can find her on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

To enter the giveaway, leave a comment below and I’ll use Random.org to pick a winner. Winner will be announced on Monday, May 5.

48 Comments

God is trying to tell me not to dye my hair…

A few weeks ago, I decided to change things up and part my hair on the left. Yes, I know, you are thinking that I’m an insanely wild woman who lives on the edge. However, when I did, I was horrified to find a new group of inhabitants in my part line.

It seems a family of gray hairs has decided to set up camp on the front part of my head. This was my reaction upon inspection.

gray hair

Because I am a fearless ruler who doesn’t stand for intruders. I decided to take action.

I picked up one of those root-dying at-home hair kits, determined to bring back the brown and eliminate the gray.

I put on the gloves, read the directions, and mixed the dye.

As I started to put the first glob of color on my hair, the little strand of gray with the color dangling on the end of it proceeds to swing from the side of my head, directly into my eye.

I screamed because from the immediate burning sensation of my eye socket and proceed to yell to my husband, “I’M BLIND! I’M BLIND! LET ME LOOK AT THE CHILDREN ONE LAST TIME”

He rushes into the bathroom, pushes me into the shower (I’m fully dressed, by the way) and proceeds to flush the dye out of my eye.

When I come out of the shower, take off my wet clothes and put on my bathrobe, I snap this attractive picture.

eyeball

So now, I have an eye infection AND a sea of grays.

If you are looking for me in the next few days – I’ll be the one wearing a bandanna in my hair and sunglasses over my eyes.

It’s seriously hard to be this attractive.

 

4 Comments

Top 9 Worst Kinds of One-Upper Moms

Ever met a one-upper mom? Oh yes, yes, you have. Admit it.

top-9-worst-kinds-of-one-upper-moms

VIA: MATT CARR/THE IMAGE BANK/GETTY IMAGES

Here’s my list of the Top 9 WORST kinds of one upper moms I wrote for Nickelodeon’s NickMom. I have no doubt you have met at least one of them in your life. They are probably the same kid that in high school told you they didn’t even need to study to get that “A” on the final…

Which one from the list would drive you the most crazy?

#9 might be mine…

To read, click HERE.

And if you like it – click “Like” in the article and maybe even share with a friend. Let’s rid the world of One-Uppers!

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Things I Can’t Tell My Daughter


My five-year-old daughter thinks I’m perfect.  I can say with certainty that she is the only human being on this entire earth that thinks that.  She tells me that I’m beautiful, and that I’m the best mommy ever.  She tells me that my hair looks like Princess Belle’s and that my jokes are hilarious.  And my goal is to keep her living those myths and lies for as long as feasibly possible.

I’m not naïve. I know that once she reaches middle school those beaming glances of adoration will be replaced with disgusted eye rolling.  And one day, she’ll tell me that I don’t understand what it’s like to be a teenager, or that I was never young like her so how could I know anything about what she’s going through.  And I will smile and nod, knowing the entire time that there was a world before having her that she never knew existed.

She’ll never know that on my 16th birthday, I snuck a boy into my bedroom for the first time ever and let him make out with me, not because I liked him, but because I wanted to see what it was like to kiss a boy in my room.   Verdict:  Not so great.  I had to hug him afterwards just to wipe his sloppy saliva off of my mouth.

She’ll never know that I danced on a table for my 21st birthday after my close friends threw me a child’s birthday party at McDonalds, and then proceeded to vomit all over my boyfriend at the time, his roommate and their dog. Even after three baths, both the dog and myself still smelled of puke.

She’ll never know that in high school, my friends all snuck into Heather Yeil’s basement and watched our first porn to see what it was all about.  I snorted Sprite out of my nose from laughing so hard during the first scene.  Needless to say, since watching it, I can’t look at a pizza delivery man the same way again.

She’ll never know that I lied to my parents to go to the after prom party with a boyfriend they didn’t like.  That I thought I was ready to move past kissing, only to run away and hide for the entire evening.  Once he found me, I had to convince him that it was normal for girls to have their period numerous times a month, so we had to wait for any kind of lingering touching. I only hope that he still doesn’t believe that today. Or maybe, for his wife’s sake, I hope he does.

And she’ll never know that I will have to sit back and watch her make those same memories, mistakes, and mishaps, just like my mother had to watch me do.  And through it all, I will smile and hope that maybe, just maybe, she’ll always believe that I’m the best Mommy out there.  If not, I’m hoping she’ll always believe that I have the hair of Princess Belle…

(I originally wrote this for Blogger Idol back in 2012 and decided to re-post after my daughter told me yesterday that I had, “the world’s best hair”… I dread the day she realizes the truth.)

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Job posting


I’m hiring. Desperately looking for an experienced toddler translator. You must be able to decipher meaning found between stomps and screams. Must be able to lift at least 30 lbs and be open to being peed on. Apply immediately with resume and alcohol.

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Eat. Drink. Be Skinny! Is it possible?


EatDrinkBeSkinnyLogoBlackRecently, I led a webinar for Sverve called “Top 10 Mistakes Bloggers Make” – it was such a cool experience and I got to “meet” a bunch of bloggers that I had followed myself for awhile. One of those was Teresa Howes, she’s the blogger behind Eat, Drink and be Skinny and author of SkinnyTinis-All the Fun for Half the Calories. It was actually the first book ever published to feature only low calorie martinis in 2009. I think she’s the original SkinnyGirl and far cooler than Bethany!

So after chatting for a bit about all things cocktails (since we know how much I love those!), we thought it would be fun to do a little joint interview. We came up with 5 questions that we both had to answer. I’m posting her answers on my blog and she’s posting mine on hers. Check my answers out tomorrow on her blog at www.EatDrinkandbeSkinny.com

1. What inspired you to start the blog?

People had told me for years I should start a blog to record all my running adventures, skinny recipes and — well, probably to give myself a place to organize my thoughts (self-disclosure: I can be a bit all over the place). When SkinnyTinis was released in paperback in 2012, I thought it was finally the right time to go for it and launch a real blog with real effort to support it. I had been signing all my books “Eat. Drink & be Skinny –Cheers!” since 2009, so it only made sense. With luck the URL was available and I jumped right to writing in cyberspace and haven’t looked back since! I love creating a space full of happy, healthy, fit and fun recipes, workouts, inspirations and stories of my adventures. It’s so much more time consuming than I would have thought. But I never feel like I’m working because I truly love the process of writing, sharing, and collaborating in the health and wellness space. I optimistically look forward to many years ahead of learning to better understanding barriers people have to a healthy and happy lifestyle and to create and provide solutions that work in the real world.

2. What is your favorite martini recipe? 

That’s like asking what’s my favorite pair of shoes — there are some many things to consider and the answer so depends on the circumstance :)

  • ​If I’m bringing a drink for an event, I almost always bring the Lean Green SkinnyTini Machine. It’s all natural, really refreshing, and you can make it in batches and serve it up or over ice. It’s always a crowd pleaser and I often swap out the gin for vodka to keep things simple. People love the fresh cucumber juice!
  • If I’m up on my rooftop patio with girlfriends — I can’t help but whip up a pitcher of this Skinny White Sangria. It’s also super easy to make and I love using real fruit in my cocktails these days to boost the phytochemical power of these concoctions.
  • If I have a sweet tooth I can’t kick and/or want a little pick me up with my boozy-tini, I love this Skinny Latte Martini. It’s rich and sweet and makes you zippy on top of tipsy, which can be a great way to kick off a fun weekend!

3. What is the key to your happiness? What triggers unhappiness for you?

I think you have to laugh at yourself and not take things too seriously. Which sounds easy on paper, right? But let me tell you, when I forget that, that is exactly what triggers unhappiness. I try not to be competitive with myself, but as a runner I can’t help it! So when I have a bad run – I get so grouchy. I’m also tough on myself with my business. If I mess up or don’t get the result I was hoping for, steer clear of me until I remember to laugh it off. As soon as I realize that absolutely nobody in the world cares as much as I do and that I’m literally creating my own unhappiness, I can come around. But it is a skill. And like any skill some days I’m better than others and it always takes practice.

4. What’s an embarrassing habit you have that would surprise people?

Well, that’s a tricky one because you have to decide what’s really appropriate to throw out into cyber space. But I think I’ll go ahead and admit that as a self-employed, CEO of my own biz, I declare the dress code. And let’s just say I’m not in the fashion business by any stretch of the term. I’m a gym rat, runner and writer. 90% of the time I’m sitting at my desk in mis-matched workout clothes or dare I confess even just some booty shorts a tank top with my hair in a bun and no make-up. For this very reason I shy away from Skype and often play dumb like I don’t know how to use it. LOL.

5. If you could walk down the street and have a song playing for your theme song, what would it be?

That song by the Cranberrries called Dreams. You know it the one that goes “Oh, my life is changing everyday,​ in every possible way.​​..” I heard it when I was in high school and it was oh-so relevant. Now it’s on my iPod and comes on often when I run. It’s equally, if not more relevant today than 20+ years ago. And I have yet to decide if that is a good thing. But at the very least, it’s an exciting life and I’m doing exactly what I want to be doing. I just have to hope that the stars align and I can pull this urban hippy lifestyle together and make enough of an impact to be granted the privilege to continue this journey.

You can find her on Facebook, Twitter, and on her blog at Eat.Drink.Be Skinny. She was also recently on the morning program, San Diego Living mixing up some fun things. You can check that out here.

And you can check out my answers on her blog tomorrow!

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Only 479 more people on Facebook then I’m going retro, folks!


So, uhm, yeah, this is really going to happen. There’s no going back now. I’ve ordered the lime green banana clip. And a few minutes ago, I got this picture sent to me by a reader.

so 80's makeup

I believe I can officially check makeup off my list now too. And yes, you can actually buy it. It’s from Manic Panic. Click on the picture and it’ll take you to their crazy fun site. I’m hoping the makeup actually makes me feel “so bold” like they promise…

So the latest update is that we have 479 people left before I’m going all retro on your asses.

To follow me on Facebook, or to send the link to your mother to follow me, and heck, even your grandmother, click here: https://www.facebook.com/MartinisAndMinivans

Let’s do this, people.

And if you need inspiration, here’s the picture I’ll be recreating.

banana clips

I’m working on getting that devious little smirk just right…

And through this all, the most fun has been seeing all the bloggers and readers that are cheering me on. The blogging community is amazing and I wanted to give more shout outs to some awesome folks. Seriously, go check them out – they ALL rock.

Life & Leopard A Boy, A Girl and the Marine Corps
Sweet and Savory Spence Mom Needs A Drink
Runaway Mama Cookie Dough and Oven Mitt
Jill’s Rants Saltwater Sessions
Slightly Off Kilter Bolton Carley
Nothin’ But Crazy Love Liv, Laugh, Love Media
Quirky Pickle Ashli’s Cookie Creations
Girl Gone Veggie Mom to Step and in between
Harley and Heels Yellow Mango Life
Healthy Notions Overstuffed Princess
Next Life, No Kids A Dish of Daily Life
The Golden Spoons Maternal Media

 

Thank you all – you are so amazing and truly make writing fun.

Now go to your mothers to click “like”…

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You all are AWESOME! I still need your help!


So yesterday, I came up with the insane idea that I would recreate a picture I saw on Pinterest when I reached 5,000 Facebook followers. Since Zuckerberg basically hates bloggers and doesn’t want to show their content, I thought it would be fun to show him the power of bloggers and their readers.

And let me tell you. Holy crap – I’m completely blown away. We are seriously getting close to 5,000. I have about 600 more and then I’m there. Yesterday, alone, there were over 150 new followers.

You all seriously rock.

But, I still need your help. Tell your family, your friends, the old boyfriend from college that you wish you broke up with earlier, pass them along my Facebook profile and ask them to give it an old likey like. My link is www.facebook.com/martinisandminivans

I, especially, wanted to thank the bloggers that have been spreading the word and bringing new folks my way. Since I believe we all need to work together to promote, I wanted to do a shout out to each of them. They each work so hard and are awesome –  and they all have something special about them that you should read.

 

Snarkfest Mom Saves Money
Bakes In Slippers Real Life Parenting
You Signed Up For What! Daftly Domestic
Creative Ramblings Absolutely Prabulous
MinettesMaze Coolest Mommy’s Coolest Things
Mommy Needs a Break Sensory Mama Saving Cents
The Mother Freakin’ Princess Madly Wish
Cluttered Genius Playdates on Friday
Oh My! Omaha LPO Beauty
Science of Parenthood Missy Homemaker
Maternalmedia Mardra Sikora
Fiberartsy I Make Myself the Queen
Full of it Eva Laflamme – The Tattoo Tourist
Not Enough Wine In The World Happily Ever Laughter
The Happy Hausfrau My Stay at Home Mama Life
Tarnished Tiara Mom Life as a Field Trip
Notes from Heidi The Lazy Mom’s Cooking Blog
Forever 51 Andilit
My Mis-Matched World

 

And no worries, I’ll be doing another post with any bloggers that help out after this post is published. There’s plenty of shout-out in me for everyone!

And oh yeah, here’s the picture I’m planning to recreate. I can’t even look at it without cringing….

banana clips

(Picture from Forum Novelties, Inc. at http://forumnovelties.com/ – and yes, they do really sell them. Insane, right?)

Thanks SO much! You all ROCK!

 

9 Comments

The return of the banana clip…


Earlier in the week, I posted this picture that I had found on Pinterest on my Facebook page.

banana clips

 

Followers on Facebook went crazy! We all agreed that banana clips should be the fashion trend that never returns again. It’s worse that off-the-shoulder shirts and MC Hammer pants. It’s even worse than scrunchies and acid wash jeans. It’s the fashion trend that made all women look like horses.

So since everyone felt so passionate about their hatred for the banana clip, I’ve decided to have some fun with it. When I reach 5,000 followers on Facebook (I’m a few hundred away),  I’m going to re-enact this picture and post it on the blog. That’s right, I’m going to figure out how the hell to crimp my hair, do this makeup and wear a banana clip – all for you guys. So if you want to see that, and heaven help you if you do, send some folks over to my Facebook page.

I’m shaking my head right now at this plan – I can’t believe I’m doing this. And I’m really not sure my hair will ever recover from it. It sure as hell won’t ever forgive me for it, I can tell you that much.

To follow me on facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MartinisAndMinivans

(Picture from Forum Novelties, Inc. at http://forumnovelties.com/ – and yes, you can actually buy the banana clip there…)

 

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11 Hours in the Life of a Mom’s Outfit…


NickMom_badge350 (1)It’s seriously hilarious to write for Nickelodeon’s NickMom. You can be funny, sarcastic and then also have an illustrator take your words and bring them to life. I love it.

This post especially makes me laugh because I wrote it completely from personal experience. And I’m wondering if this cartoon is what I actually look like. Funny, I thought my ass was much bigger…

It’s the stages of what a mom’s outfit looks like after 11 hours. And it’s the reason that I’m waiting to buy silk or anything not made of cotton or polyester until my kids are in college.

To read, click here.

And, does my ass really look that small? Damn, I’m hot.

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