Operation Fat Ass

muffin topA few years ago, a friend of mine came up with the phrase, “Operation Fat Ass” – it was her mantra for her weight-loss program. Last week, I decided to adopt that slogan and use it as my own.

Listen, I’m not a girl who think she’s fat. I’m really not. However, I am the girl that has had 2 children and weighs more than she feels comfortable weighing. Is it tons more? No. But it’s a number I’m not comfortable with.

And I could blame it all on the kids, but that’s not really the truth. That might have been how it began, but the path continued with my deep-rooted love of all things processed food. Me and Little Debbie snack cakes have been together a long time. Additionally, I pretty much hate exercise. I could probably watch 15 episodes of Doodlebots and enjoy it more than I do working out.

However, something happened this weekend that changed everything. I went to the movies with my daughter and when we sat down in the seats, I looked down. I was horrified by what I saw. My muffin top roll was actually over my pants and pulling my jeans zipper open. I can honestly say it was the first time I really hated my body. I’ve disliked it at times but never true hated it.

So I made the decision to break up with my fat rolls. I’m dumping their asses harder than Ben Affleck dumped J. Lo when he realized she was from Crazytown.

So let the games begin. I’m using an app to count calories, I’m actually taking a cardio class 3 days a week, and I’m trying to limit my alcohol. Yes, insert cries of pain and anguish here. That’s the one that is truly killing me. But notice I just said limit. Let’s not go all crazy and think I can give up my cocktails… I’m pretty sure I’d get back together with the fat rolls before I’d do that…

Operation Fat Ass begins. It’s been one week and I feel like Little Debbie is sad and lost without our friendship. Please send her my love and tell her it wasn’t her, it was me…

(pix from www.youbeauty.com)



  1. I’m initiating Operation Fat Ass here,too. I hate to exercise and was thinking of what I could do to make that more appealing. I haven’t figured it out but my 3 year old has been doing this thing lately where he RUNS down the street and I have to chase him. I guess that works,right?

  2. Right there with you. Exercise sucks and I only do it so I could eat. The only thing that kept me going was a trainer, but I just canceled after a year and I don’t think I’ve been to the gym in 2 wks. Ugh. Good luck. I know I need it!

    • Martinis and Minivans says:

      I thought about going to a trainer but I feared that I would disappoint them. I’m very good at making up excuses!

  3. Oh man… I am about to hit my rock bottom soon I am sure!

  4. michelle says:

    fitness is good for us and helps us feel better. i’m a BIG fan of my fitbit. check it out. we can be fitbit friends. it’s motivating. xo

  5. I have to admit, I love to workout. I get bored, so am constantly trying different things, but exercise has been part of my life for the last 23 years and is one of the best stress relievers for me. Make sure that you work some strength training in with your class. It is actually more beneficial than cardio and you will notice results quicker, particularly if you circuit train. Also, the added muscle will be helpful in keeping it off. Good luck.

  6. Oh, my, girl! Now, I’m the one who uses her muffin top as a nice ‘shelf’ for her cocktails, so I don’t know about this whole getting-rid-of-it….just kidding. I’ve got far more weight/muffins than I care for. I was at the movies this weekend with my lil & big dude & to be honest, we got the el humungo butter popcorn, so that covered up my ‘shelf’ during the show. No problem! That & the diet Pepsi is like health food, right? Best of luck to you. You inspire me–To go make a drink til the urge to exercise passes.

    • Martinis and Minivans says:

      Ha! I love it! I always feel a sense of accomplishment if I provide others with drinking opportunities.

  7. Today I am at a high weight for me, and tried on dresses from my “big” sized section of the closet to hear my almost 9 year old say “well…even though it has a pattern, it still shows your belly, like a baby is in there.” (there isn’t). I love that she’s honest, and was very gentle with her opinion, but it really made me realize that the added pounds are between my ribs and knees. 😛 Having to go Thur to the hometown to wedding festivities is NOT helping the matter, but operation fat ass is ON. I lost 15# last fall on weight watchers, just doing the point system. I found 12 of them by quitting the point system. You get what you put into it, GOOD LUCK!!!

    • Martinis and Minivans says:

      Oh no! Don’t you just love their honesty at times??? :) Hang in there – you can do it! (I keep telling myself that and it is sort of working…)

  8. Good for you! I have been trying since February without much success – probably because I hate to exercise and I love to eat. Not a good combo. Due to traveling, holidays, etc. I haven’t worked out in 2 weeks and it is showing! Gotta get back on track~

    • Martinis and Minivans says:

      It’s hard – I admit it. I’m trying to just incorporate into my routine. Though, i like my routine of eating fatty foods and watching reality tv much better…

  9. I’m a part of operation fat-ass myself. I just started Insanity on Monday, and let me tell you… it’s insane. They have every reason to give it that name. It’s a 6 days a week program and it’s already whooping my ass.

    But I’m on a mission to lose this baby weight. My best friend is cookie dough, and I’m giving her up for the time being. But I’d rather eat my cookie dough without my muffin top.

    • Martinis and Minivans says:

      How’s it going? I’m actually enjoying it more than I thought. Weird. :)

      • I had to hold off a week and I’m starting tonight (I had a back injury). I have replaced the cookie dough with veggies and got some healthier food for me to eat. Hopefully I start seeing results in the next 3-4 weeks.

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