New Year’s Resolutions I’m Not Making

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Each year, we, as a society, create these in-depth resolutions to declare a fresh start to our lives.  We write lists, we make promises and we swear we are going to do our best to try all the things we said we were going to try the year  before.  And, after one week, or in my case, one day, most of my resolutions are broken and the excuse-making process begins.

I’ve decided to put an end to this cycle.

Here are my Five New Year’s Resolutions I’m Not Making in 2013:

1. I’m not going to say I’m losing 10 lbs.  I’m writing this while eating Little Debbie’s Swiss Rolls so who are we kidding. The probability of me actually changing my eating habits is slim to none.  I might make it a week without my best friend Little Debbie, but she and I destined for a life together.  She’s a strong lady, I think she’s the one who really took down Hostess.

2. I’m not going to give up my nightly cocktail.  You don’t want to see that woman. I’m not an alcoholic so don’t be concerned, I simply like ending the night with a glass of wine or a nice martini.  It transforms me from the spit-up covered mother who hasn’t brushed her teeth or hair all day, into a woman who potentially might be attractive with a little cleaning up.

3. I’m not going to read more.  I’m currently in a wonderful ladies book club. In 2012, I read 1/2 of one book.  I simply go because I enjoy the company, food and booze.  I mean, come on, isn’t that really what book club is all about???

4. I’m not going to appreciate life more or try not to sweat the small stuff.  I’m a New Yorker. Stress is an emotion we covet. It’s like the air we breathe. Well, the air that isn’t polluted from all the large buildings and rats living in the sewer…

5.  I’m not going to turn my blog into something it is not.  I’m reading a lot of posts about how people are longing to grow their blogs, to do reviews, to get brands interested in them.  That’s great and good luck to you.  However, I’m going to continue to do what I started this blog for – to write, and hopefully make a few of you laugh.  If I can do that in 2013, I’m good.

So happy new year dear friends, family and readers.  I hope all your resolutions come true.  And if they don’t, I hope you don’t let the guilt get to you.  Try eating a Little Debbie snack – always makes me feel better.

15 Comments

Comments

  1. I’m NOT going to learn a musical instrument or give up social media. Or keep my legs silky smooth more than half the year.

  2. I LOVE this! And I kinda agree about Little Debbie – she’s one pushy SOB. Although, those damn Nutty Bars have me wrapped around her little finger.

  3. Now, now. New Yorkers don’t really covet stress. (If we did, you’d go ahead and give up that nightly martini. Enough said.) We simply love to complain. If we could complain about being stressed without actually feeling stressed, we would all be tickled pink.

  4. AMEN times 5 :)

    Happy New Year!!!

  5. Bye bye 2012! Cheers to a happy and FUN new year!

  6. I am NOT giving up coffee, switching from butter to extra virgin olive oil, getting organized, or getting dressed before noon. Nope.

  7. I LOVE Swiss Cake Rolls! Don’t give those up. I love your realism. I made resolutions last year, and I here I sit, fatter and more miserable than last year at this time. So, yeah, didn’t work so well for me. I really do appreciate your #5, though. It took me almost two years to come to that conclusion. I’m just resolving to try harder this year – at everything – because I was a real slacker last year. Happy new year!

    • There is nothing wrong with a little slacking – it’s necessary to function. Thanks for reading and for eating Swiss Cake rolls. I’m currently out in my house and going into shakes without them.

  8. Great post as usual. This is why I like you. You tell it like it is… no holds barred. And as for #2… amen!! Me too!

  9. Mission accomplished… I’m LOLing already!

  10. I think I made every single one of those resolutions, except the wine and the 10 lbs part. Would you be my mentor in not giving a fiddler’s fart if they don’t happen?

  11. I am so with you. I lift my martini to you madame! Cheers! Found you through Bloggy Moms.

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