I hate dinnertime. There, I said it.

When I was pregnant with my first child, I used to fantasize about family dinners. You know, those dinners like The Cosby Show where everyone goes around the table and says what the highs and lows of their days were. However, what The Cosby Show didn’t show was what those dinners were like when their kids were toddlers. I’m guessing that Clare had a flask in her lawyer briefcase that she would steal sips from, and Cliff would say there was a baby being born and secretly run off to the bar.

Dinner is officially my least favorite part of the day. I think I would suffer through Barbie and Ken getting married for the twelfth time this week than having to sit through a dinner where I tell my daughter to stop kicking the seat and my son to not spit food across the table again. Yes, I know they are only 4 and 22 months and I need to go through these times to teach them proper manners and such. But let me tell you, if I were rich, I would hire a nanny for 1 hour a day. All should she/he would have to do is sit at the dinner table with them. I would use that hour to finally put on deodorant, brush my hair and heck, maybe even solve the problems of world peace – a mom can get an insane amount of crap done in just one hour.

But tonight, I’ll try again. And maybe I can’t be Clare Huxtable, but heck, I figure if I get fed up enough, I’ll just start kicking their chairs and spitting food across the room back at them. If you can’t beat them, join them, right?

14 Comments

Comments

  1. I’m right there with ya, sister! But I hate the “making dinner” part!!

  2. Only reason I hate dinnertime is because our ability to plan usually sucks. I have no problem scraping together whatever might be in the fridge during the day but come dinnertime I want a real meal. And with my husband’s whacko work schedule at times I’m occasionally alone at dinner. At that point I usually just say screw it and head out to Chipotle or Qdoba or even Panda Express. Waste of money and the salt in the food makes me puff up but it works for me.

  3. Melissa says:

    You read my mind! The phrase “Eat your food,” should be turned into a drinking game at my house.

  4. ROFL! I think you still have problems as they get older, just different ones. I have given up and just shoot for getting together around the dinner table once a week .. and it isn’t always for dinner, sometimes it is Sunday morning breakfast, but whatever works :-D

  5. Usually when the time to make dinner approaches, I am so spent from the day all I want to do is throw pop tarts at them and go crash on the couch. I Know ( bad parenting at it’s finest.) Especially now that summer is here…I find this whole getting them to sit and eat thing very challenging!

  6. Dinner is actually pretty pleasant in my house, although my kids are much older than yours. And we only sit down to dinner a few nights a week. And I hate cooking it. And cleaning up. So really only a small portion of dinnertime is pleasant.

  7. Mine are 7 and 9 and I still hate it. By this time of the day I am done refereeing and just want to eat in silence, but not watch stupid Disney XD cause seriously it may be more painful than any of the kiddy shows ever were.

  8. We used to have a babysitter come after dinner time on the rare occasion we would go out. After a few times of doing this, it suddenly hit me that we should have the babysitter come during dinner and then it was really a night off. Dinner time is so hard with little ones!

  9. Oh my. I am 150% with you!! I’m part-time at work right now, and part of that deal is I get to spend late afternoons with my kids (yay!) but also get burdened with dinner every flippin night (boo).

    I’m going back to work ft in the fall, and I’ll be sharing dinner duty every other night with my husband. I think even with the added work stress, my life will be less stressful than it is now!!

  10. We came up with a way to make table manners work – when the kids were little we sat down and made just a few rules: Cup has to be towards the middle of the table, at least 1/2 way “north” of the middle of the plate (cut down on spilled drinks like AMAZINGLY), No burping, farting, or “potty talk” about any body functions, if it requires a untensil (think mashed taters) you must use one. Simple enough for the kids to remember. Then, if they violated a rule, they got a tickle. In the early years when this was first implemented, if they went the whole dinner time without violating any rules, THEY got to tickle us. And the rules applied to EVERYONE, so if Dad said fart, he got a tickle too. As they got older we implemented more rules, like don’t talk with your mouth full, etc. They are now 8&10 and I don’t worry if they are eating at a different table, I know they’re at least eating somewhat civilized. Hang in there, these days will pass quickly! :)

  11. I would rather have a root canal than have a family dinner.

  12. I basically based my worldview on the Cosby Show.

  13. This reminds me for some reason of dinner at Stephanie Plum’s house in the Janet Evanovich series. The Mom makes herself some “ice tea” in the kitchen when she thinks no one is paying attention. I’ll be tweeting this on @penpaperpad. Take care!

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