How the heck do you potty train a boy??


potty training boyWhile everyone is talking about New Year’s resolutions and things they are looking forward to in 2014, I’m bracing myself for the  pee-filled world I’m about to embark on.

2014 is the year of potty training my son.

The year I have dreaded since the nurses held his little body up for the first time and I saw that he had a penis. The year where my carpets will soak up the lovely scent of urine, and I’ll have chafed hands from the excessive amount of hand washing that will occur.

Why do I have so much dread?

Because I’m terrible at potty training. When we did it with my daughter, she ended up terrified of poop and having to get an enema. Yeah, that really happened.

But with my daughter, at least I understood the parts. I knew where she should sit, what she should wipe and how the process all worked.  However, with a boy, I’ll be damned if I know how that part works. Heck, I can’t figure it out on grown men, how can I tell a 2 year old what to do? And honestly, considering there’s a stain of pee around most men’s toilets, it seems that even grown men aren’t sure how it all works either.

So 2014 – screw you. I might make this the year I teach my son how to change his own diaper – I’m guessing that will be a heck of alot easier than what I have in store for myself in the next 12 months.

12 Comments

Comments

  1. I actually found it easier to potty train my son than it was to potty train my daughter. It wasn’t the difference in parts, it was just he was easier. He initiated it on his own instead of me pushing it. I did teach him first sitting down and he got the standing up part later on. The pee stained carpets actually didn’t happen until he was already potty trained and he went on a kick of proving he was not going to do what I said and he peed on his rug several times in retaliation. He still hasn’t gotten it at night, we get him up and take him before he goes to bed and I make husband do that after one time I took him and had to aim it for him he was so out of it. Yeah, not happening anymore – that crossed my line ha ha

  2. good luck! channeling you happy pee memories.

  3. I think potty training is the hardest part of parenting. So not in the manual. I was even given an e-book from a friend who swore it was the best thing ever (I can send it to you if you want, just let me know!). She trained her son in 3 days with it.

  4. I taught the boy to sit and “point it down” when I trained him. Once he had that down, my husband taught him how to stand. I wish he still sat. Sigh…

  5. It’ll be easier with the 2nd kid than it was with the first. My first was a nightmare, didn’t potty train until he was darn near 4. It was 100% stubbornness. With the 2nd I was too tired to fight about it with him and let him ‘go’ at his own pace. One day he said, “I not wear diapers anymore.” I said, “You’ll have to use the potty then” so he did. There were maybe two accidents and that was it. The key was he saw big brother using the potty and wanted to do it too plus I wasn’t really pushing him. It sucks like when you’re in line at the deli at the grocery store and you’ve waited what seems like hours for your number to come up, you’re next and then “I gotta go.” It’s always then. So I wasn’t sweating it the 2nd time around and it was so much easier. 3rd one, same story. It won’t be so bad, you’ll see. :)

  6. I have a 9 year old and a 6 year old (both boys)…aim is always a problem.

  7. I’m right there with you. My son is 27-months-old and semi-ready. Problem is, I’m not. The few times we have visited the potty, he has touched everything from the seat to the lid to the handle. He’s even stuck his head inside the bowl. Me and my OCD germaphobia are not handling this well at all!

  8. I have one word for you: cheerios. Throw a few in the potty and challenge your son to aim for the target. You’re welcome. And Happy New Year.

  9. I often say that I’d rather birth five more children naturally without drugs than have to potty train a boy. My son was impossible. Impossible. So impossible that he would put his little potty on his head. As a hat. But he wouldn’t pee in it. Ever. He’s seven now, and he did finally master peeing in a potty, mostly. I mean, he gets most of it in the potty. Sometimes I think he might where a blindfold.

    Something to note: the bathroom where he pees will always smell vaguely of urine. No matter what. I’ve tried EVERYTHING.

    Good luck to you. I really truly mean that. I hope your boy is easy. Happy New Year!

  10. I have the same challenge ahead of me this year. Please do share what works for you, and a happy new year!

  11. How is it going?? My 5 year old boy only recently mastered pooping on the potty and I’m delaying training my 3 year old boy…My biggest mommy fail! I HATE potty training!!

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